I like this thread and wish to contribute......so i'm playing drums and singing one night for a packed house and out of nowhere i get slammed to the floor from my right side....it was a girl who tackled me down!!! The band stopped....the crowd laughed....i got back up and i was livid....that's when i saw the security guys dragging off a girl!! I got embarrased and we continued the show....!!
We were on the road in Boston in support of our album release opening for Electric Flag when i get hit with a piece of a chair!! It was maybe 5/6 inches long and was pointed at one end and it was stuck in my right arm!!! The song stopped...i got up off my drums and looked out at the crowd and started firing off obsenities as loud as i could...pulled the thing out of my arm and stormed off the stage....the crowd was dead silent....the other guys talked me into returning to the stage and continuing with the show....i was not a happy camper! We were a reggae band it was 1976 and everyone was yelling "play some rock and roll"!! We did sell 2 records that night tho!! Yes, i still have the scar from that stick!

The TakeOffs
"Kauai's Only All-Instrumental Surf Band"
http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-TakeOffs/312866840587

One night about 10 ? years ago, Insect Surfers played a benefit way up in the mountains behind Malibu. The hosts were allowing their ranch-type property to be used as a training ground for Greenpeace protesters , to practice scaling large buildings and bridges to drop their slogan-bearing banners from. There was a 5-story scaffolding on the property that i clambered up after playing ( i love heights!). Our bassist informed me that this caused me to miss Woody Harrelson ambling by ,right below ,in a cloud of ganja smoke ...
Sure enough, a few weeks later the Greenpeace-ers hung a huge anti-whaling banner from the Golden gate bridge!!

A year or so ago, my band played at a packed gig at a sports (golf?) bar rented out for a big party. During the first set, the head bartender got visibly agitated at the band because we did not have a vocalist. Of course, we told him to serve the drinks and pipe down and just laughed it off. So he decided to remedy the situation by throwing things at us on stage. All kinds of wet bar rags, trash, ice, etc. kept hitting us out of nowhere!

We figured out after our set that the bartender was behind it so we made sure we dedicated every song to this guy. I mean every song...and gushing, flowery dedications like you have never heard. Midway through the second set, he must have reached his limit because he turned off the stage lights and cranked up the piped-in house music. It was classic rock, 70s kinda stuff and way loud.

The owner relieved him of duty after we abruptly stopped and asked the crowd to hunt him down. (A couple of guys tried!) An apology from the owner and short break and we played on. Then the promoter wanted a third set! So we did it, apprehensively but for decent pay.

SSIV

1. In 1980 I was in a band that was signed to MCA. They booked is into a gay club in London that was very trendy at the time. Amongst the audience were Chris Spedding and Leiber and Stoller - whom I did meet and speak to. They were very drunk. You would have had to be famous to do that - it was about 20$ for a small beer.
   

2. The same band played at a USA versus England Speedway final in the centre of the track in a big stadium. It was exactly like playing to no-one as they were all so far away. It was very windy and the cymbals kept blowing over.
   

3. We also played on the back of a truck in central London outside the BBC headquarters until moved on (gently) by the police.
   

4. Many years later in a different band we did a gig at an 'Outdoors Club' which turned out to be a euphemism for 'Nudist Colony'. We were the only people clothed. It was amazing how quickly seeing everyone naked became no big deal. We started to feel weird for being dressed. (no we didn't strip off)
   

5. A pub that was ironically called 'The Happy Landing' in the centre of a big council estate in London was the scene of the most violent and bloody mass fight I have ever witnessed. Brave musos that we are, we hid behind the drum kit until we could make a break for it.
   

Needless to say the Police knew better than to turn up. Afterwards, as we were packing up, various bloody survivors with semi-detached body parts came up to say 'Great band lads - sorry about the bit of trouble'. We should have known better when we first arrived and asked one of the regulars where the bands set up: 'As near to the door as they can get' he replied.

http://www.myspace.com/thepashuns

Youth and enthusiasm are no match for age and treachery.

tonybologna
The TomorrowMen playing at a rave in San Jose at 2 am. 'Nuff said.

Squid Vicious opened for a rave once. Some guy said, "Man, it takes a lot of balls to play that clean!" Then he asked if he could play my guitar. I love when total strangers want to play my guitar. "But I've been playing for 25 years! I know what I'm doing." No dice!

Ted James
Deep Eddy Records http://www.deepeddy.net
The Nematoads http://www.nematoads.com

A bass-player friend of mine got called to play upright with a string quartet at the Glen Eden Resort in Corona. When they got to the gig, they found out that it was "clothing optional" for guests and the quartet. It's a nudist camp. They chose to play clothed.

Fights? Play country, you get used to it. High end big bucks wasted weirdos? Play jazz piano in chateau country ( and don't drink the wine! ). Attack of the drunken women? I suggest the casinos in Atlantic City, the bouncers think it's funny when your trying to play with a drunken girl grabbing everything you've got. Finally good old flash pots, back in the late seventies they were almost required for a rock gig. We had 7 of them, at the end of the night the drummers is collecting them and exclaims "Hey! This one didn't go off", that's when it did, right in his face. Burned the hair off his face, beard and all, in a lovely circle of charred hair and beard. I suggested it was a good look for him, it was not well received.